Magnet X-ray

Due to complication during my labour I had to undergo a few medical checkups following up on my migraine problem.

And since they will insert contrast medel into my body, I couldn’t breastfeed coz they’re afraid that the liquid will leak into my breast milk and become toxic to baby so Elias couldn’t drink from me for 24 hours. I never expected that it would be so difficult to do it. I was so sad because Elias refused to drink from bottle and he was crying and at the same time he was looking at me in my eyes as if saying, please mama, why can’t I have your milk.. I don’t want to drink from bottle. And when I carry him he thinks that he is about to be breastfed but I couldn’t give it to him even though I had so much milk. I almost felt regret for doing my scan today.

But we had a meeting with our children’s nurse and she reassured me that it is normal for baby to refuse bottles but they will take it when they are really hungry. It also felt so good to be talking to someone professional about Elias. So when we come home, I put Elias on the bed, lied down next to him and gave him his bottle. He must’ve been so hungry because he took it directly. I was so close to crying thinking of how hungry I’ve made my son today. I felt like such a terrible,
terrible mom!

The next morning, which is today, when Elias woke up at 5 I gave him my milk. I felt so happy because he still wants to drink my milk but kind of guilty now coz I just had to wait 3 more hours until the complete 24 hours period but I didn’t and now I put Elias in risk of being intoxicated. Oh…!!


Elias on our way home from Johanna’s place.


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